Every Day a Little

Do you know how easy it is? 

To sit behind a screen and type out all these things? Do you see how simple it is to string words together and suddenly be a preacher? Explaining the dot-to-dots of life, talking about loving and being loved, about how to follow God, about how to make a difference, about how to not judge people and put them in boxes. It's so easy. 

Why is it so hard to live out? Why do the connections and explanations and inspirations become blurry in real-life situations? Why is it so common that I get inspired by a post and tell myself to change, and then crumble under the real-world? 

Because it doesn't happen so simply. I get frustrated with writing sometimes because it's so easy to type out how to live a good life and how to be a better person and how to squash those faults that have been burning inside me. It's so easy to see it on a screen. I feel like I'm two different people: the person who posts on this blog, the person who appears to have things figured out, who can set words in a sentence and have it make sense. And then the person who goes to school and fails the test or says something rude or ignores God's voice constantly. 

I think we're all kind of like that. I don't think we need to think we're two different people. Life is hard and we are weak. But if you have the intention to change, to be better, to start listening to Him whispering in your heart, then there's no need to beat yourself up, like I tend to do. We try, we fail. The important part is that we try again. 

"To reform. Every day a little. This must be our consent task if we really want to become a saint." 

That's a quote from Saint Josemaria Escriva. It's my senior quote. My mom picked it out for me. I had wanted to find a quote that could sum up my high school experience, and the more I think about it, the more relevant this quote is. I've messed up so many times, but what matters is I want to keep trying. Every day a little.